• Currently 4.14/5 Stars.

Ponda Baba to Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

• Currently 4.08/5 Stars.

zombie to Middle Ages

• Currently 4.06/5 Stars.

omelet to milk

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in case you weren't aware . . .

It'sSeward's Day. So, um, Happy Seward's Day.

See? This is what beading does. It brings to my attention obscure Alaskan holidays. And I am so much the better for it.

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tagged

I haven't been on the internet much lately because my kids have commandeered my computer to play games. So, today while dorking around, I belatedly realized that my friend Holly tagged me. I'm it. That's right. Me. I feel like I just got asked to sit at the cool kids' table.

So the deal is that I'm supposed to reach to the nearest book that is at least 123 pages, find page 123 and write down sentences five, six, and seven. The nearest book to me was actually the "Lehi City Sesquicentennial Cookbook," but unfortunately it only had 49 pages. And can I tell you how much I love this cookbook? LOVE IT. It has an awesome recipe for peanut butter cookie bars. (If you grew up in any public school in Utah County, you know what I'm talking about.) Plus, the cookbook has nifty little facts and stories scattered throughout, such as:

"In the winter of 1866-67 a group of jolly young girls wended their way to the Slater home in northwest Lehi. It was extremely cold and the snow was very deep. The girls were going to get their fortunes told. During the evening Sister Slater mentioned she had slept cold the night before and dreaded going to bed. After bidding the kind sister good night, the girls decided each one would piece a strip of material and make a quilt for her. In a few short days the sister was made happy with a nicely pieced and quilted cover which she ever cherished."

And you are not the only one shaking your head in confusion. Like, was Sister Slater a fortune teller? And why didn't I have a Sister Slater around when I was growing up? But, moving on, the next book that had the requisite number of pages was Choke by Chuck Palahniuk, and if you are at all familiar with this book, right now you are thinking, no way will she even be able to post anything remotely readable, because that book is a dirty dirty evil book and Marie has certainly been red-flagged by the moral vigilantes at the Spanish Fork library. I'm on a "list" somewhere, I just know it.

But turns out, sentences five, six, and seven, aren't that bad. Nevertheless, if you are offended, I'm sorry.

"The milkmaid, Ursula comes out of the cow shed and looks at us with her stoner eyes just about filled with blood. [new paragraph] If there was a girl you liked, "I say to him, "if she wanted to have sex just so she could get pregnant, would you?" [new paragraph] Ursula grabs her skirts up and comes stomping through the cow poop in her wooden clogs. She kicks a blind chicken that's in her way."

Okay, I couldn't resist including sentence number eight. And at some point, maybe, I'll tag five other people. Email me if you want to be tagged. I can make you instantly popular.

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me, full of generosity, churros

So, I played my first my first game. Just to restore ryan's dwindling faith in humanity. I did it all for him. I'm selfless like that. (SeeMother Theresa.)

And it was really fun! (SeeDisneyland.) Now picture Mother Theresa at Disneyland sharing a churro with me. Go with that.

• Currently 3.06/5 Stars.

• Currently 2.40/5 Stars.

• Currently 2.00/5 Stars.

• Currently 2.92/5 Stars.

• Currently 2.94/5 Stars.

• Currently 2.57/5 Stars.